Musings of a Servant of Allah
Verily in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest. (13:28)Archive for Spirituality
On Sacrifice
Assalamualaikum world!
Ok so I’m back, after far too long 
Thought I’d muse on something close to everyone’s heart. At some stage in anyone’s life, we’re faced with challenges.
We will surely test you in your wealth and in yourselves and you will hear many hurtful things from those who were given the book before you and from those who associate others with Allah. If you are steadfast and beware of Allah, that is the strongest position.
Aal ‘Imraan: 186
Amongst the hardest tests, I’ve found, involve giving up something you love for the sake of Allah. Something which you know, deep down, isn’t good for you in this life and the next.
Our vices may be different, but they all have the same effect – they harden our hearts, and bring us further away from Allah, our Merciful Creator.
As hard as it is to make that sacrifice, make dua and ask Allah to give you that courage to step up, and make that clean break. It’ll hurt at first, but after hardship, there is relief. And even if you fall again, get up and ask Allah for strength, guidance and forgiveness. His Mercy is greater than our mistakes.
Sacred Law was taught to us to increase good, and to decrease harm. Allah knows how fallible we are, so in His Mercy, He has sent down Prophets and Revelation, to help us reach Him. Think of our end goal – Jannah – where we can find lasting peace and His eternal pleasure. Make every day a concerted effort to get on step closer to Him.
Look at the small blessings we have everyday, to spur you into higher levels of worship. A roof over your head. Family and friends. The freedom to go to work and school. A wide selection of food to choose from. The luxury of holidays. SubhanAllah, so many of us are blessed, and all of this originate from Allah, Most Generous.
May Allah make it easy for you when you give something up for His sake. Know that He will reward you with something far, far greater.
Shaykh Abu’l-Hasan said this to Ibn ‘Ata’ Allah, in response to the younger man’s various worries and sadnesses:
There are four states of the servant, not five: blessings, trials, obedience, and disobedience. If you are blessed, then what God requires of you is thankfulness. If you are tried, then what God requires of you is patience. If you are obedient, then what God requires of you is the witnessing of His blessings upon you. If you are disobedient, then what God requires of you is asking forgiveness.
Ibid., p.196, read in The Key to Salvation: A Sufi Manual of Invocation
:)
Salams world!
So…I’m back. Alhamdulilah. Lots has happened, subhanAllah. Life is an ongoing journey…with ups and downs. What matters is dealing with it with as much optimism and trust in Allah as possible.
The Sydney suhba 2008 was incredible. It was such a blessing to be able to sit in the presence of Shaykh Nuh, and later on, his wife Umm Sahl. Alhamdulilah, they’ll be coming every year now, instead of every two years! We’re so blessed. InshaAllah next year Umm al-Khayr and Sheikh Ashraf will come too.
Gratitude marks my path to the Divine. Knowing that everything I am afflicted with is not ‘by accident’, but through the loving kindness of Allah, because He knows what will bring me closer to Him. He is what I regard Him to be, and in my time of need, He is my Compassionate, Merciful and Generous Lord, who hears my call. Sheikh Nuh’s advice to me is to remain optimistic. Hope is always so very important when faced with the trials of this world.
I’ve reached a crossroads in my life now. What keeps me focused and grounded is the remembrance that Allah Most High, in his Perfection, knows me better than any other, and has placed me exactly where He wants me to be. It’s up to me to reflect upon my situation, and reap the fruits of it.
There is good in everything Allah tests us with. May Allah grant us all patience, steadfastness, and acceptance of His Decree.
On the Harvard suhba…
Shadhili tariqa: the path to the divine
Do check out the very interesting audio selection on the left hand side. A very soothing reminder, especially in times of difficulty.
The entire selection is here: Harvard suhba.
I particularly like how Shaykh Nuh reminds us all about that eternal truth – everything perishes except for Allah. Where will we be, 50 million years from now? All gone. But Allah remains – and all deeds that done for His sake.
May Allah accept our good deeds.
*
A few of my close friends from med school are back from overseas…can’t wait to catch up! Lots has happened. Alhamdulilah, I’ve been blessed with a few good friends, and I can’t wait to sit down and catch up over coffee or dinner. I’ll miss not being in their cohort, with my whole deferral and all…but all things happen for a reason. Allah is the best of planners.
I used to honestly believe in this quote “I am the Master of my fate and the Captain of my soul”…but that’s not the truth of the matter. Allah is the master of every atom in this universe. That’s a huge blow to the ego, but also a relief – realising that no matter how well-intentioned and perfectly executed a plan is – if Allah decides it not to be, it will not, and if He decides it is to be, then it will. Allah is the one in charge. And alhamdulilah for that, because we’re human, necessarily imperfect, and Allah runs the universe to perfection. We’re just too limited to see it, at a macro level. He does not wish bad upon His creation, and loves us more than we love ourselves.
Surrendering to the decree of Allah can be difficult for control freaks e.g. myself. Just…let…go…
On suffering
Faith makes suffering, sufferable.
Hardship is part of the human condition. We all face trials. Custom made to test us the very limit. Some of us are tested in our health, wealth, loved ones…the the list goes on.
Night and day. Sunshine and rain.
Life is cyclical. Whether we like it or not, the ebb and flow of life will continue til the day we draw our last breath.
The key to staying afloat? Acceptance. Submit to the Divine Decree. Be proactive, do your part, and leave the rest to God.
A wise young woman told me this yesterday: “You’re going through hardship because you need to. Allah is preparing you for something better.”
Consider our Beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). He lost his parents and grandfather at a young age, lost his uncle, his wife, his sons, his friends…and each loss caused him immense pain. Yet he recovered, grew from each experience, and never once stopped thanking Allah for the blessings he did have.
So if you’ve hit a brick wall, take heart. This too, shall pass.
“Renunciation of the world is followed by peace; its desire brings sorrow. Restrain your desires, discipline your self, and do not allow anyone to oppress your soul.” (Rabi’a, Rabi’a the Mystic)
Eid Mubarak! (or Selamat Aidilfitri)
Umm Atiyah (ra) reported: “The Messenger of Allah (saw) commanded us to bring out on Eid-al-Fitr and Eid-al-Adha, young women, hijab-observing adult women and the menstruating women. The menstruating women stayed out of actual Salaat but participated in good deeds and Duaa (supplication). I (Umm Atiyah) said to the Holy Prophet (saw): Oh! Messenger of Allah, one does not have an outer garment. He replied: Let her sister cover her with her garment.” (Muslim)
Eid Mubarak, dear reader! Or Selamat Aidilfitri/Hari Raya Words, once cannot encapsulate the radiant joy which this blessed day brings. May Allah protect you and your loved ones, always.
My family and I have the absolute privilege of living 10 minutes away from the masjid….so here’s a snapshot of this morning:
Ahmad: Wake up! Eid prayer starts at 6:45 am.
Me: Uuuuugh.
Household: *General commotion, sounds of last-minute ironing, showering, “Have you fed the cats??”, “Did Mak (mum) already leave for the masjid??”, all against the soothing backdrop of takbeeratul Eid wafting from the radio*
Radio: *live broadcast from the nearby masjid* Allahuakbar!
Boys: Oh no! It’s started! *Ahmad and Abdul Hadi dash off*
Muhummed: Funny how slow it takes to button your clothes when you’re late.
Me: Murphy’s Law.
Muhummed: Where are my socks? Ah. Got it. Ok let’s go.
Me and Muhummed: *Shut the door and start jogging to the masjid*.
Muhummed: So what’s the ruling on running to the masjid?
Me: Well it’s best not to, just to maintain dignity…
Muhummed: Ok. Well they’re still on the first ra’kaat, so that’s a good sign.
Both of us: *We maintain the brisk pace, the sound of the imam’s beautiful recitation grows louder as we draw closer…and the sight of worshippers overflowing from the masjid and into the street tugs unbearably at our heartstrings*
Me: *getting emotional* Ok, maybe you should say goodbye to dignity just for now so you can make it to the prayer on time!
Muhummed: Ok! Bye!
It is absolutely breathtaking, seeing rows and rows of worshippers bowing in unison.
It’s a reflection, once again, of the paradisial reality. Angels scattered throughout the heavens worship Allah throughout their lifespans, so when we mortal humans put the world behind and raise our hands in prayer, we embrace our angelic natures. By the same token, when we recklessly succumb to baser desires, we sink to the level of unthinking animals.
Eid is all about celebrating our angelic natures. For an entire month, during daylight hours, we successfully abstained from all those things which mark our creatureness – the need for food, water, and the act of procreation. By effectively suspending our creatureness, we better orient ourselves towards God, every soul’s true north.
May Allah accept our fasts and bless us with the opportunity to greet the next Ramadan.
*
And when the prayer ends, everybody gets up, and order dissolves into chaos. Ha, another reflection. The trick is to maintain that inner tranquility one feels inside prayer, outside prayer. The state of ‘eternal prostration’ which the realised Sufi attains.
The mad hunt for friends and family begins.
This is part of the fun of Eid at the masjid. Navigating through the throngs of people, prams and police officers. lol.
It’s always great, bumping into old friends from highschool, my previous university, my current university…reminds me of how connected we all really are, despite our different directions in life. We all worship the same God.
On accountability
Praise be to Allah, Lord of the Worlds, for blessing me with another day of life on this Earth. May He bless me with the privilege of being one of His beloved slaves. Imagine that – Allah turning to the angels in the heavens, and telling them that He loves me. There is no greater honour. O Allah, let me be worthy of your love.
I spoke to my mother once, during one of my darker moods, and asked her this: “What’s the point anyway? Of all this? We’re all going to die anyhow.”
She smiled at me and said in her quiet, unassuming way, “Well…this is a very susah (difficult) state to get to, but the point is to want to reach Allah. And that is very beautiful.”
Yet again, she has the answer.
*
‘Rabb’ is by far one of the most poorly translated words in the Arabic language. It’s loosely translated as ‘Lord’, so ‘Rabb-el-alamin’ would mean ‘Lord of the World’….but the word has far more depth to that.
Rabb means Creator, Sustainer, one who raises us in degrees…one who is concerned for our well-being. He loves us more than we love ourselves.
Shaykh Nuh says that the one who sees reality for what it truly is, will measure his or her actions against the yardstick of eternity. Will this bring me closer to or further away from Allah?
Hence the title of this post. It’s all about accountability.
I want to live my life according to two cardinal rules:
1) Giving Allah His due
2) Giving everyone else (including myself) their due.
Easier said than done, no? Giving Allah His due means performing all my obligatory and recommended acts of worship with the intention of seeking His Countenance. Giving everyone else their due means acknowledging the rights of others upon me – including my own body parts. Muslims believe that on the Day of Judgement, our own body parts will speak against us, if we had sinned with them in this life.
It makes sense. Everything is on loan. Our bodies, souls, families, talents, wealth…..it’s all a test to see who will do good.
That which is on earth we have made but as a glittering show for the earth, in order that We may test them – as to which of them are best in conduct. [Chapter 18, verse 7]
Life, to me anyway, wouldn’t make sense any other way. Without an Afterlife and A Fair Judge…. too many souls are abandoned to the vagaries of fate. And life is cruel. There is far too much injustice and bloodshed on this Earth for this life to simply be it.
God will not wrong us in the least.
*
Shaykh Naeem has this fascinating concepts of many things in this world being reflections of the paradisial reality. How does one define reality, to begin with? Let’s check good ol’ Wikipedia:
Reality, in everyday usage, means “the state of things as they actually exist.” The term reality, in its widest sense, includes everything that is, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible. Reality in this sense may include both being and nothingness, whereas existence is often restricted to being (compare with nature).
So Muslims believe that this life is a temporary reality, whereas the afterlife is the eternal reality. The real reality, if you may. With that in mind, Allah, in His mercy, has ‘dropped hints’, so to speak. Clues that point to our Eternal Home.
Look at the ritual of Hajj, for example. Totally strange, at surface glance. Leaving the world behind, wearing simple garments, men shave their heads, and everyone circumambulates around this big black box (Kaa’ba) in the middle of the desert.
What I didn’t realise til very recently was the fact that 70,000 angles circumambulate around an equivalent black box (Baytul Makmur), in the heavens, every day, until the Day of Judgement.
Spine-tingling, isn’t it? We were all made for eternity. This world is just a pit stop. A tantalising, alluring pit stop for some…..and absolute hell hole for others. Personally, the former is far more useful as far as saving our souls is concerned! The more attached you are to this world, the easier it is to find God irrelevant. The more hardship you face, the easier it is to fall to your knees and beseech His help.
May Allah keep us steadfast and on the straight path.
The madness of fiction
Second day of freedom!
Feels strange, to say the least. I mean sure, technically I have Wednesday-Sunday off before the final 5 weeks at of full-time uni over at Westmead Hospital….and that could seem rather short, but it feels like practical infinity. I am grateful for every non-study moment which I have.
Stephanie Meyer’s books are great Been plowing through them over the past few days. Escapism via fiction is a fascinating kind of drug. Sci-fi/fantasy has that effect on me.
My current thoughts are this – how do you balance being in this world, while not being completely consumed in this world? Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) was with God, constantly, in that sense, while it can be a struggle for me to keep focused in prayer.
Ramadan is almost over. May Allah grant me and my loved ones the blessing of meeting the next. Death is something so remote from our minds, but do any of us, really have that guarantee of getting through tomorrow in one piece? Hm. Nobody does. But we live under false illusions that every day is just another day, when we’re really a step closer to Reality. We’re all on countdown. I forget that, too easily.
I’ve been feeling disconnected. Disjointed. Definitely time to amp up the acts of worship going again, especially in these last days of Ramadan.
May Allah keep us grounded and God-centered, while being on this Earth
Imam Ash-Shafiee would say, “Time is like a Sword. Cut it (wisely), before it cuts you!”
It’s showtime!
O Allah!
Lord of the Heavens and Earth, the All-Knowing, All-Seeing. The one who is Ever Living and Never Sleeps.
Grant me clarity of mind
Calmness of heart
Tranquility of soul
Sureness of step
Bring to me that which is best, keep away that which is bad, and keep me content with it.
Amen.
How my faith sustains me through medical school
Apropos, the day before my Barrier exam.
1. Keeps me focused on the bigger picture
2. Reminds me of my accountability
3. Helps me view patients as people and creations of God
4. Prayer punctuates my day and gives it structure
5. Earnest supplication keeps my heart alive
